Reframing Tragedy Into Triumph

           The following is a quick personal example of reframing a “bad” experience into a positive one. Two weeks ago, a virus wiped out everything personal document on my hard drive. The computer repair person confirmed there was no way to recover over 4 years of my personal work including thousands of forms, 4 books and numerous projects in various states of completion. The initial feeling was that of nausea, despair and hopelessness (all #22 on the Emotional Scale (the absolute bottom).

I realized I didn’t have a time machine to go back in time to fix this! Plus I didn’t control anything other than my reaction (remember Suffering = Trying to control the uncontrollable).     Within hours I realized that I needed a better perspective so I found one! I looked for the gifts in this event. I began realizing that the “fire” (virus) cleared out all the dead wood (unfinished/stunted/unfinished/ rudderless projects) and allowed me to focus on what was critical. Luckily the universe helped me find backups of certain key projects and all the really important ones I had emailed to others! Now I realize this “loss” gave me wings in supercharging my 4 most key projects (Robodog, Cobra in the Closet, Soul Play and Men’s Circles). I challenge you to look for the gifts in your trials and tribulations!

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How to Live to 100!

         I completely support and strive to live my life in this way, I hope you do too! Thanks BY for the link!

http://www.shape.com/lifestyle/mind-and-body/how-live-100-starting-today

As always, I’d love your feedback and/or comments.
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When we Allow the Universe Provides

I was joyfully reminded how the universe provides for us when we are in alignment (being our authentic, most brilliant selves). I have been working diligently behind the scenes with some very talented and generous individuals who are helping me create a new brand that will really connect (Official unveil April 6th, 2012). As such a world class web site is being created. As with all great work, someone needs to be paid!

       As such I was required to provide 50% of the cost up front and needed a few hundred dollars extra that I didn’t have. I didn’t worry about it as I thought, “The website will be begun when its time is here.” Quite unexpectedly, the money came in via a new client that was referred to me suddenly (thanks JV!). Incredibly, the amount was almost exactly (+$9) what I needed to begin the website.

Being in the moment and not focusing on the “lack of money” issue (Insecurity/Guilt/Unworthiness are #21 on the ES) allowed my universal manager Mike to handle the details.

As the beloved Hannibal in the 80’s series “The A-Team” was fond of saying, “I love it when a plan comes together!”.

Your challenge this week: To allow the universe’s abundance to touch you (the Universe is limitlessly abundant). Your job: To Allow!

What Catapults You Immediately into Your Most Brilliant Self?

        The particularly (unusually) mild winter of 2012 allowed me 2 days riding on my Dakar motorcycle. Oh the pure unadultered joy of riding a motorcycle (forget the cold for just a second, brrr!) was ecstatic for those 2 days. I just thought I’d share that because there are always activities that automatically catapult me into joy, flow and honestly give me my mojo back when it drifts away!

       Some of mine include running trails with my dog in the park, losing myself in Skyrim video game, my remote control monster trucks, writing, speaking, coaching, running men’s groups, a warm tender romantic evening with a partner you love, etc. As you can see I have many things that immediately shift my state to one of utter love, joy, empowerment, passion, appreciation and faith that all is well. When I feel that way, really amazing, innovative and intuitive ideas bubble up and are ready for exploration. What do you have or do that immediately launch  you to that space.

If you don’t have many, that’s your homework. Here’s a quick test: if you wouldn’t do the activity if I gave you 3 perfect health months to live, then it’s not a true passion! Forget costs, practicalities and self-created “thinking small” limitations, do what makes your heart sing. If you don’t know what does that, I challenge you to try one new activity per week for 8 weeks and then come and talk to me about living life as if every moment is your last. Before that, we both have some homework as I need as many of those activities too and practice what I preach by trying a multitude of new things and loving it!

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Inner Calm in the Outside Storm and Saying “No” Powerfully

       As I am sitting looking out my 23rd floor penthouse window, the snow is falling in a driving wind. A perfect metaphor for my note this week to you. My building is doing major renovations replacing the existing balconies with new, (debatably) better looking balconies. The jackhammers are wailing outside my window as I sit with ear plugs in my ears a hat on my head and my pets somewhat (understandably) freaked out at the cacophony and powerful vibration. It just happens I’m working a lot more from home this week! Add to all that 2 fire alarms in less than 12 hours. I would completely justified in being frustrated, and raging. The OUTER WORLD (of events and circumstances) is a complete disaster around me here, but here’s the thing, I’m not!

        As I watched the other people in the lobby reacting to their emotions, fears and general vibrations based on the OUTSIDE WORLD, I was very calm, certain and secure in my INNER WORLD (of thoughts and emotions) that ALL IS WELL. I’m somewhat surprised at how well I’m reacting to all this disruption. Once you really, really, REALLY realize that pushing against that which you don’t control doesn’t change the situation, in fact it aggravates your vibration as “what you focus on grows”. Don’t get me wrong, I will be leaving ground zero for a few hours this afternoon but overall, calm reigns. I challenge you to really start noticing your (over) reactions to the OUTSIDE WORLD, and remain calm and centered in your INSIDE WORLD. Yoga is great and all but why not always have access to that calm, still place in every moment of your life? Now that’s freedom!

I got a call today from someone who I have been trying to begin a project with for 14 months. He finally had a project for me worth a fair amount of money that I would have literally jumped at as little as 2 months ago. It felt great to turn the project down and telling him that, “I don’t feel it in my heart anymore and all MY projects are taking off and I want to keep working on those!” I had to be truthful with him and it was a relief. Living authentically is a skill like any other. He reacted very well to my assertion and wished me luck as I did him.

Challenge: What will you say “NO” to (to pursue what really jazzes you) powerfully this next week AND feel great about it!

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Your Job is to Ask!

       As this ridiculously mild March weather has made my apartment rather warm with the patio quarantined and barricaded for repairs. I set off to purchase a trusty floor mode fan at my local giant megabox home improvement center. As I visited one place, apparently their winter clearout was in full swing with no fans. Off to the second store where only one remained in a battered and re-taped box. Normally I would just fork over the $18 and head home. Not today though as my inner deal hound smelled a discount opportunity.

       My first reaction was, “You don’t want to be one of those people!”. You know, the never satisfied always looking for a deal, pain the you know what. Then the wise me chimed in and said, “No, the box is battered and bruised, let’s try to save a few bucks, this might be fun!” As I approached the customer service desk, I read the button on the lady behind the counter, “WE ARE EMPOWERED!”, so I asked for a discount.

As she grabbed the phone to call another associate, I asked her, “Hey aren’t you empowered?”  She smiled and said, “Apparently not enough!” After about 5 minutes and another associate I got a $4 discount on the $18 fan, an over 20% discount that I would have never gotten if I didn’t ask. I felt triumphant as I left realizing that in this life you get what you ask for not a penny more.

I challenge you this week to ask for more of your life, who knows it might be worth a lot more than $4!

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Precocious Summer and Womanhood

Precocious Summer and Womanhood

         Last week in one of my daily jaunts in the park (with my curious canine partner) it was a beautifully and unseasonably warm mid-March day. As I was jogging in the trails 3 scantily clad women came into my field of vision. As I approached and passed them, I was shocked to realize they were not even teenagers, they might have been 11 or 12 years young. They looked ready to hit a nightclub or dance around a pole somewhere.

I don’t have any kids of my own and am probably going to say something quite ignorant here, but damn the torpedoes, here goes anyway! What kind of world (media-fuelled, inspired and motivated) produces such a glaring attack on decent values and sensibilities? A world where our values have been corrupted, co-opted and hijacked. I consider myself very open-mindedand non-traditional in my views, and still I was shocked. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying we lock pre-teen girls in the basement or anything (as anything you push against or repress usually mutates to something worse, ask the Catholic church).

I get to see most of these same young ladies (I wish that gentlemanly term returned) about 7 years later as they enter my College Business Presentation classes. I must continually remind them that they want to be judged on the amount of personality, intelligence and unique quirkiness they bring and not the amount of skin they show. Additionally, it is not a coincidence their self-esteem is very low as they to emulate an impossible body image example from Hollywood.

I wish I had a solution, but I don’t. As long as we live in a consumeristic society that finds it’s moral compass bearings from pop music, movies and entertainment (fear and lack-based) this type of superficial value-related behavior is here to stay. My best advice: Set a good example yourself, that’s all you can do. I’d love your comments on this.

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Exit Quantum Leap Coaching – Enter 2BFRANK

Exit “Quantum Leap Living”, Enter “2BFRANK Living”

             This will be the last Quantum Leap Living Newsletter as we are moving to our new 2BFRANK – umbrella of products and services, and of course website. Our new tagline is “Freedom to Stardom”. Identifying my ability to have everyone reach for their own versionof stardom.

Don’t shed a tear though, as you will keep receiving this weekly newsletter but it will now be called “2BFRANK Living”.

I’d like to take this opportunity in advance to thank the magicians behind the incredible work you will see next week on our brand architecture. I mean this from the bottom of my heart, I am so appreciative and humbled by the support the Universe has given me on my dreams.

Pete Widdis: Is the Marketing genius behind the 2BFRANK brand strategy. Pete has won numerous branding awards for Campbell Soup and speaks regularly at brand conferences. He essentially captured my “no holds barred, tell it as it is, authentic truth” philosophy and packaged it into something everyone will be able to understand and relate to. The word brilliant fails to describe him adequately. He is also a close friend, thx brother! If you want Pete’s info, contact me.

Zac Hobson:  Is the super-talented graphic artist responsible for the capturing of the honesty, power and vibrancy of the suite of services we offer. The logo below will be specifically for the newsletter. Thanks Zac, for a great effort and result! Zac’s website: http://hiyah.ca/

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Elephant on the Menu? Sure! One Bite at a Time!

Every week the task (and pleasure) of writing this newsletter dawns on me. I am sometimes asked how do I find inspiration to write? This is a great question as so many people dream of writing some even dream of being a published author. I must be honest about 2/3 of the time it’s very easy as I have a topic in mind all week and it is a natural conduit to the newsletter. The other 1/3 of the time (like this week tbh!) it is more difficult (still doable but harder). I thought I’d share some of what has worked for me.

I found that my little inner voice aka STUMPS (Saboteur Trickster Most Pathetic Self) was less active (STOPPING ME) and when I said , “I will begin to write a book” and not “I will be an author” or “I will write a book and it will be great”.

Another example, If you have been thinking you want to run a half (13 miles/ 21 km) or full marathon (26 miles/42km) but you are not running now. The gap between not running at all might as well be the Grand Canyon! With this type of goal-setting you will lose interest and get discouraged quickly. A better (softer and less of a stretch) approach would be to say, “I’m starting to run and I commit to 3 times a week 2 km per run” (remember how to eat an elephant: one bite at a time!).

Once I had written my first book (Killing Yourself With Your Fork?) in 2009, my STUMPS had another run at me this time saying, “Yeah, you wrote a book but it’s not a REAL book, it’s not that good!”. They are nasty! Here’s how I resolved this more subtle but just as harming one. I reframed it! “I’m a great coach and speaker who writes books too!”, see how this is much softer and more accessible. We can choose what thoughts we put in our minds and change those we don’t like!

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