What You Should Always Take

I came across this section in my upcoming book, “Live It!” (avail. Oct.). The original title of the book was “Take It!” and this section aimed to clarify what we should take (what is ours not others’). Enjoy!

WHAT YOU SHOULD ALWAYS TAKE

1. All opportunities put in front of you that resonate with you (connect to your soul and heart) You always learn more from the opportunities you take (even and especially if you fail, remember, we learn more from failure) than by not taking a chance.  By not trying you miss all the learning that occurs when taking chances.  Fortune favors the courageous and brave.  Not making a choice IS A CHOICE, a choice devoid of any courage or learning.  NOT making a choice is always the worst option as others then make their own choices, benefitting themselves.  If you don’t make a choice you lose the insight and self-actualizing benefits of trusting yourself.  Taking charge and making choices leads to feeling in charge of your life.

2. Life as a great game of exploration and adventure!  Doesn’t that sound like a great way to see it, instead of a great series of problems, hurdles and disappointments?

3. You always need to get clear on WHAT you want and WHY you want it Once you know what you want, life becomes so much simpler as you can choose powerfully and quickly and not look back with guilt.  This is your #1 quest in life, “What do I want (for myself) and why?” Once this is clear, a multitude of “difficult” or even seemingly “impossible” situations can be dealt with from a place of empowerment and certainty. That’s an amazing way to live!

4. The present moment as a gift.  Another name for a Christmas or birthday present is “gift”.  That is what the present moment is; a once in a lifetime gift never to be experienced again.  All of our power of decision and choice must necessarily occur in the present moment (since we can’t time travel yet).

The word decision is derived from Latin and means, “To cut off all other options.Much of your daily practice should center around being present to all the beauty of nature and the wonderful people around you.  Get out of your head and into your heart!  Any time we worry or are apprehensive (Fear), we are DEFINITELY NOT PRESENT!  In the present moment is where all action can occur.  Most people spend much too little time in the present moment.  We go back to the past and feel guilt or anger, or we think of the future, which is good if we see it as positive.  Many people simply dream of a better future.  A dream without a plan and action is simply a fantasy.

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A Cottage Frame of Mind

        Last week I had the pleasure and privilege of renting a cottage in the Haliburton area.  The weather was rainy. Regardless, it was still wonderful as only a place far from the hustle and bustle of city and regular life can create. As with most vacations it took a day or so there to get used to the new place and change in routines on all fronts. Isn’t that why we go away on vacation? To change the routine, see new things, people and experience life through a different lens.

             Some insights from the cottage came to me today and I thought I would share them with you.

 Mother Nature: Without the distraction and sound and visual pollution of the city, amazing sights and sounds are right there and spectacular. My first night there was amazing as the power of a thunder and lightning storm created a Halloween sound and visual landscape. One lightning strike was so close and powerful that my trusted Riplee dog launched onto the bed with me! The pitter patter of rain on the leaves and roof is something to behold.

 The stars at night are absolutely breath-taking and very visible.

The air is completely different (nights cooler) leading to sounder and deeper sleep.

Food:  Eating becomes one of the central themes of the day as one removes most/all regular tasks and responsibilities. Preparing and sharing a meal with your family is a great chance to connect.

No Cable TV:  As much as I’m a minimalist in terms of what I consume on television, once at the cottage, the only indication of civilization was the background radio station playing classic 70’s-80’s music harkening back to those glorious musical generations. Watching an older DVD of “The Great Escape” for the first time on a 13 inch TV has its own quaint appeal. The lack of cable TV also opens up the time for board and card games with much merriment. I was fortunate to have internet so I could still stay in touch with the Olympics (my little obsession) and a couple of coaching calls. I have always dreamed of coaching from a cottage, that dream happened this week and was amazingly motivating for me to get my own cottage-type place soon.

Miscellaneous:  One other interesting tidbit was that I had brought my laptop in the hope of doing some writing on my newest “Motorcycle Chronicles” (working title) book. Although I did ride into Algonquin Park, I DIDN’T feel like writing at all! At first I was worried I’d lost my writing touch. Then I realized (and reframed the experience) that this was what was meant to be and I enjoyed the writing break. Maybe my current writing location (dining room) environment is part of my “being a writer”.

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The Crying Games (Olympics Edition)

                       I’m not going to lie, I’m an Olympics junkie, there, I said it. From when I was a child and the Olympics came to Montreal in 1976 I have had a fascination with the level of competition, camaraderie, come-from-behind human stories and pageantry that is the Olympics.

                      At my high school the Olympiads were a great time for me even thought I wasn’t the fastest or strongest but always gave my all. I used to dig long jump pits in the back yard and dream of beating Bob Beamon’s incredible 29 foot record.

                      So this week as I was feverishly putting the final touches on “Live-It” I was watching all the events with moderate to high interest. Truth be told, the Track and Field events are by far my favorite (they begin Saturday Aug. 4th). Still, I was hooked.

                       Particularly on Wednesday night when the men’s 2000 meter 8’s rowing was on, Canada was in 4th place for the first ¾ of the race. Then at the 1500 meter mark, they hit the turbo boosters and moved up to finish in 2nd place for the Silver medal.

                       I was literally crying of joy as the emotion of the team and the power of their teamwork and resolve pushed them to the podium finish. I was imagining what it would be like to train day in and day out in the heat, cold and dampness day after day, week after week, month after month and year after year and then be in “the race”. The race against all the best in the world, knowing I was also one of the best in the world. Wow! Exhilaration, pride, joy, appreciation, freedom and empowerment would course through my veins. All these emotions are the best we can ever feel (All #1 on the Emotional Scale).

                      Then my STUMPS showed up, he pointed out the irony of my sitting on my couch alone crying at the performance of a bunch of strangers I don’t even know. I told him to be quiet and enjoyed that release that comes from bawling your eyes out from joy. You should try it, all you have to worry about is having a box of tissues and your ego-based pride judging you. I say go for it, get into that incredible vibration of pure emotions. Once every 4 years this happens, there is still 1 week, don’t miss it! Who knows you may enjoy the crying games!

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Milestone Celebrations

      A few weeks ago, my cousin got engaged, congratulations cuzmonious!

      As he told me the wondrous news I was so excited, I didn’t know what to say so I said what most people do, “When’s the wedding?”  He replied by telling me that he had planned the engagement for a few months and just wanted to breathe and savor having successfully posed the question and received a “yes” answer.

This little interlude is very telling of how most of us live life. We work hard and diligently and succeed at the milestones we set for ourselves. Do we savor the moment and all it took to get there? Do we relish our victory and share it for weeks to come? No we don’t. We are already focusing on the next milestone.

I believe this is a derivative of how pride is seen as a deadly sin. I’m sorry, but if you worked hard and reached a goal, you should be proud and celebrate and savor and share it for as long as you want to! I think where it’s a sin is when we let our ego get the best of us coming from insecurity.

One of the key things I do with coaching clients is have them celebrate and relish their achievements and really start celebrating more. Life is too long to only celebrate the “big” moments like weddings, graduations and new jobs.

I challenge you to celebrate a minor milestone and share and savor it all week.

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How to Get Market/Date Ready

Reader Question

This week, I thought I’d share a question I answered for one of our readers.

QUESTION: “I’m still upset/heartbroken over my past relationship(s). How (and when?) do I get “market-ready” to date?” JC

Frank: The simple answer JC, you’re ready when you are ready! What’s the rush anyway? That being said, everyone is different. You are ready when the idea of going out with someone new is very appealing. Too many people the fear being alone and then start dating coming from a lacking place. Anything coming from fear/lack is not a good perspective and will attract other fearful/lacking people.

When you’ve done some inner work towards getting to know and love yourself you will be ready. Many people don’t love (or even like) themselves and look to a relationship to fill up what they are missing. Two low self-esteem people do not a good couple make! Inadequate + inadequate = More inadequate! And they trigger each other’s unresolved “baggage” together making a mess.

When you become single after a relationship (never mind a heartbreaker!) you need time to get to know what the new (and improved), latest version of you likes and wants. Many people right out of a relationship feel rejected, dejected, unworthy (unworthiness is #21 on the ES). They feel less than complete and feel lost. A good way to soften is to look for all the gifts the relationship gave you, who YOU became because of it. You are VERY aware of what didn’t work, flip that around to what you do want. So, if you felt your last partner was “controlling”, you could say, “I’m looking for someone who values freedom (#1 on the ES) as I do.”

A certain amount of grieving must occur to process the emotions. Be gentle and enjoy exploring your “new” very different life. Reconnect to old and make new friends and hobbies/passions. Don’t look immediately for a partner as then the dreaded “rebound” relationships occur. Do the right thing and take some time to be curious about all that is possible. Most people look at what they lost instead of what they gained from their separation. When coming from lack you attract others in lack.

Good luck and please let us know how it goes!  

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Cutting the Cord & Less IS More

     Last weekend was a new experience for me as I rode my motorcycle on roads that tore the Northern Alleghany Forest in Pennsylvania mountains to ribbons in the company of my equally motorcycle-crazy cousin. Little to no traffic (the area is 3 hours from any major cities and has little to offer the cottaging crowd) made this a mecca for motorized 2-wheel exploration. The people we met were all exceedingly friendly and helpful, very nice. The 3 days communing with nature on my trusted mechanical steed opened a whole new world for me that I want to explore more, MUCH more(Passion, #2 on the Emotional Scale).
I turned my mobile phone off Friday and opened it late Sunday, and my world didn’t crumble! LOL! Being away from my regular life circumstances, people and activities was an alluring and intoxicating elixir allowing me to see what is important more clearly. I made a commitment to my self to do it more often and differently each time. This world is a big

What is your getaway from the everyday (sounds like an ad :)) that allows you to gain perspective in your life? Cut the cord, less is more!

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Celebrating One Year of  “Living”!

            It is June already! Wow! It was exactly 1 year ago (with 18 recipients) when I committed to bring you Canada’s first and only “Weekly Law of Attraction” cup of inspiration. I launched last year under the name “Quantum Leap Living” and rebranded along with my new company name “2BFRANK Living”  in March of this year. Close to 200 of you receive it currently!

            I am very excited and proud of this accomplishment and aim to make this newsletter a great source of ideas and inspiration for another year! For those of you who are new(er) to the newsletter you can even search by topic (on the right side of the page under “Search by Topic” the 46 odd entries on my site at: http://www.quantumleapcoach.ca/blog.

 Remember: Success = Decision + Action + Persistence!

 8 Tips To Leverage the Law of Attraction in Your Small Business

        I gave my “Expand Your Business and Prosper” workshop with Soul City last Wednesday and thought I’d share the big picture points with you.

1)      Get clear on why you are in business and share that to everyone, develop a mission statement

2)      Solve people’s problems generously, uniquely and personally (be real)

3)      Follow your dream, heart and intuition, (vs your logic)

4)      Always come from abundance (not scarcity) and value what you do

5)      Build an email database and communicate regularly via newsletter (Mailchimp is free and excellent)

6)      Get organized, prioritize and minimize interruptions by chunking tasks

7)      Set SMART Goals (Specific, Measurable, Accountable, Resonant and Thrilling)

8)      Have fun and be authentic!

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Spring and Change are in the Air!

          One constant in life seems to be change. Whether we want it or not, the world is always changing. We often feel threatened by change as we worry we will lose what we have or won’t like the new situation.
          I am no exception to this rule. Over the last week so many things that were working well (or so I thought!) have had some challenges. Some of the things that were not working very well suddenly improved dramatically seemingly “out of the blue”.
           I find that term “out of the blue” interesting. Apparently, it signifies thunder and lightning coming out of the sky (blue). In French, it is “tombe du ciel” meaning “falling from the sky”.
            Last weekend, a close friend of mine was visiting and we were both quite shocked and alarmed at how the weekend progressed. It all ended very well, but there were quite a few bumps. At the root was the fact we had not really seen each other for almost a year. Both of us were quite different to each other and triggered some of our own inadequacies.
In our cases, in my humble opinion we are both used to being the most intense persons in the room!
            Imagine two people like that in the same areas for extended periods! Fireworks! That said, I truly know we both got exactly what we needed out of last weekend and we are both exactly where we need to be on our own unique life journeys.
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Nurse Reveals the Top 5 Regrets People Make On Their Deathbed

By Bronnie Ware (who worked for years nursing the dying)

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people have had not honored even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.  It is very important to try and honor at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realize, until they no longer have it.

2. I wish I didn’t work so hard. 
This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence. By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others.As a result, they settled for amediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.
We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level.Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.  That’s what I’ve been saying!

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends. 
Often they would not truly realize the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.
It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.
This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realize until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again. When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.

Wow, that’s powerful, maybe you should cut it out or copy it, go to the website. I really felt a few twinges when I read that.

Self-Coaching Exercise:   After reading this unbelievable information, you need to make a commitment to focus on what matters. Use this as a measuring stick for every decision. Will I regret not trying/doing this? If yes, DO IT!

Source: [1] [i]http://www.inspirationandchai.com/Regrets-of-the-Dying.html

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The Incredible Rampage of Appreciation

I was thinking this week (I know it happens sporadically! Lol), how “appreciation” of everything, events, people and life is one of the most powerful vibrations we can access (and easiest from lower ones) . It is really strong in that it is grateful for what we already have (short-circuiting society’s do/have/consume more always!) and doesn’t ask for anything to change for us to be happy. It is impossible to be appreciative and sad at the same time!

As such, Abraham Hicks describes a great exercise called the “Rampage of Appreciation”. It really lifts our vibration and mood and really feels great!

Here’s how it’s done, I’ll use my dog Riplee as he is so easy to do (start with easy things/people/events until you get better at it!).

Example: Rampage of Appreciation for Riplee:

I love how he comes to bet with me in the morning and licks my face as I wake up!
He’s so cute when he gets excited about chasing a stick in the lake!
He’s always up to go outside for a run with me!
I love how his ears perk up when I say certain words!
He’s always overjoyed at my arrival and makes me feel so welcome!
He‘s so cute when he rolls around kicking all 4 of his paws in every direction!
He sleeps with his short tail close to his body.
He always smells so good, especially the pads under his feet!

SO there you have it.

Challenge: Find anything/anyone to really appreciate all that is great about it, let me know how you like/love it, it feels so good!

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